Wrestling Lunacy #1

PWG Bowie thoughts:

Jack Evans vs Sami Callihan

Jack Evans is a fucking maniac. He just gets on the mic and says STUFF until he gets sick of it and decides to do a shit ton of flips. Not that there's anything WRONG with that but, it is what he does now. Sami Callihan is always fun for me in that oddity department with his odd mannerisms and fun MOVEZ!~. I love how guys in PWG do shit they never try or do elsewhere, Evans on the mic being a main one. Evans continues to marvel me with his athleticism. He does shit that 1992 Rey Misterio Jr would shake his head at. Callihan kind of overdoes the boot scrape spot in the corner but the second I say that, he does an insanely awesome ropes-assisted neckbreaker thing. My apologies, Mr. Callihan. Evans is gold when it comes to crumpling like a piece of napkin falling out of a McDonald's sack. Callihan teases the whole “I'm Del Rio so I'll double stomp your shit out of the tree of woe” but Evans tells him to fuck off and nails a crazy Phoenix Splash for a near fall scare. Evans does a weird moonsault and a half and rolls into a Stretch Muffler and then rolls into a pin attempt. Crazy reversals ensue. Callihan throws a bullshit head kick but redeems himself with a sickening “Cinder Block” vertebrae rapist for a NEAR FALL?! Callihan looks beside himself and goes for som-ROLL UP BY EVANS FOR THE FINISH. Fun match. ***1/2

Adam Cole vs Andrew Everett.

This is one of those “never thought I'd want this” kind of matches. Everett became a part of my wrestling mindstate back at one of the WrestleCons a few years ago as Chiba Kid when he killed himself for the amusement of us marky marks. He's been ok since. Adam Cole however? Fucking gold. This should be interesting. Cole is a beautiful mix of the movez as well as crowd interaction which is a lost art for most. Both goes do well early on with simple headlocks and quick sequences before getting into spotmania, which is nice. Everett nearly disembowels Cole with a standing moonsault from knee city. This match feels like an exhibition of “who's niftier” with both guys trying to impress the crowd most with their movez but Cole says fuck that and takes it to the floor. Posts Everett and smacks him around like a kid on the playground that owes him a milk carton and a quarter piece. Cole does the fantastic rope run into the chinlock to the chagrin of me, your faithful correspondent. Beautiful fireman's carry neckbreaker and Cole makes me smirk yet again here. Everett looks fantastic taking weird bumps off shit, especially a wild irish whip into the ropes that he takes like a high velocity car crash victim. Everett hates his body, I have decided with his bumps. Cole decides after giving Everett a disc realignment, that it's time for sucky sucky but Everett FIYERS UHP but Cole doesn't care and kicks his knee like a dick. Everett says HAHA and hits a nice frankensteiner. Everett no sells knee damage and hits a springboard dropkick that is very pretty. Cole gets out of Dodge but Everett decides it is SHOOTING STAR PLANCHA TIME and nails it well. PWG's faithful worships their flippy overlord. Sweet falcon arrow by Everett for 2. If a company could reign Everett in, they could get a lot of use out of him. Cole does a lovely running knee to Everett's goat face and decides to party like it is 1985 with a figure four! Cole puts over really wrenching it on here while Everett finds a way to escape. Everett makes us remember 2003 Low Ki with a Tidal Wave kick for two. Beautiful super kick that Everett takes nearly on his head that would have been a GRREAT finish but no! Scary reverse hurricanrana has Cole reeling and Everett going for break with a pretty shooting star press for TWO! BY GAWD! Cole finally gets sick of all this shit and hits a Canadian Destroyer followed by a suplex into a nice neckbreaker. Good match but wayyy too many lost finish opportunities. Typical for the current independent style though. ***

Trevor Lee vs Zack Sabre Jr.

ZSJ is so fun to watch these days and ditto with Lee. I've actually enjoyed Lee's current stuff in TNA with the X-Division title and that says a WHOLE lot because I don't watch TNA for NOTHIN'. Lee is such a little prick with his gesturing. Lee gets tired of early lock ups and claims he has to break so he can pull up his kneepads which had me dying. So naturally, ZSJ decides it is time to WORK SOME LEGS and takes Lee's ass down. Lee is smart to it though and rolls out before damage can be done. Lee working everybody with the kneepad business is a nice thing. Lee even shows some fun wrestling prowess with a sweet take down but ZSJ is the man on the mat so he finds his way out. ZSJ goes for the kill with a leglock by Lee squirms to the floor. That's the big story here; ZSJ wants to hurt Lee with sexy submissions but Lee won't have that shit and would rather fuck around. We get a WrestleMania 6 test of strength with Lee getting ZSJ into a bridge and they work that bridge like hell. Lee goes for pins with his weight but ZSJ's neck is strong. ZSJ worms himself into the offensive with a straight jacket hold that Lee reverses and we have a little back and forth until ZSJ slides away. The usual smoothness is alive and well with ZSJ. Lee is still pissed and lets us all know it. ZSJ looks annoyed which makes me smile because it means ligaments are in danger. Sure enough, ZSJ decides rather quickly that he'd like to take Lee's arm home to the UK with some nice armlock movements until he gets bored and takes Lee down. Now the focus is on Lee's legs. ZSJ just floats from limb to limb and while someone would criticize this, I think it is very sound. Lee has his elbow rearranged with a ZSJ elbow stomp. ZSJ takes a strange hot shot and sells like someone slit his throat. Lee gets in a nice European Uppercut for ZSJ's troubles. Lee starts being a huge dick and scrapes ZSJ's face with elbows before launching him like a rocket with a hip toss from corner to corner. Lee does his best to return the joint moving wrestling that ZSJ employs but ZSJ will not be DENIED and starts to kick Lee to shit. Lee responds with a kick to the face from Hades. ZSJ begins a flurry with rushing European Uppercuts from corner to corner and Lee attempts to change course but fails when ZSJ soccer kicks his head off for a near fall. A nice sequence ends with a crushing dragon suplex by ZSJ that has the crowd go wild. We then get a nice tornado DDT into a modified Kimura Lock with a body scissors. Lee fights like hell to his feet and rushes into the corner to break. ZSJ does a weird jumping triangle but is met with a wild backbreaker and ultimately a running double stomp that Lee does so well. Lee gets caught in a standing submission that floats into a tiger suplex for two but is instantly locked into a wild Stretch Plum looking hold but Lee finds a way out and hits a seated superkick. This match would have been god-like with a little less speed and more selling but that's a constant critique for this era and style. ZSJ takes Lee's arm and gets another standing Kimura on until Lee reverses it into a sick Orange Crushesque move. ZSJ survives though and works his way into a wild looking Octopus Hold that he modifies to incorporate a leg lock and Lee has had enough. This match is worth it for anyone curious as to what ZSJ is all about. Lee is strong here also. ***1/2

“Speedball” Mike Bailey vs Evil Uno

This is the first time I've seen Uno in his “evil” phase. I recall him being fairly good with Stupefied in SSB so this might be awesome. Mike Bailey is fucking awesome so there's that. They get into an abdominal stretch spot early until Bailey tells Uno to fuck off and throws him away like he's Rick Steiner. Uno starts to get pissed that Bailey nips up out of everything he does. Eventually, Bailey even starts putting Uno down with moves and so Uno says it is all good lets be friends but when Bailey shakes his hand, he DDTs his ass! Yes, I like you Uno. Uno works on Bailey with some eye gouging and headbutts to the stomach. Bailey does cool flips out of predicaments until he double knees Uno and it looks nasty. Uno goes to the floor and Bailey tries something off the apron but Uno will not hear that music and Alabama Slams his ass into the apron edge! Bailey crumples and I love it. Uno does a Harley Race vertical suplex to the floor before taking a seat in a chair...that also happens to be sitting on Bailey's windpipe. NO BIG DEAL. Uno does the whole “I'mma chop you on the post” spot but kills his hand. Bailey tries to take advantage but Uno puts him down with a neckbreaker. Uno then becomes 2009 Randy Orton and starts stomping the piss out of Bailey. He even bites Bailey's foot! What a sick and evil fuck! Bailey tries a fleeting comeback but Uno keeps him beaten down. Uno shows his love for NXT and hits Baron Corbin's finish for a near fall. I definitely don't know the name of it and really, who cares? Uno displays more reasons to hate (or if you're me, love) him with his choking and gouging of Bailey in the ropes. Uno throws the ref into Bailey and hits a slam before going into his old SSB pose using the ref. Fun spot for us marks from 2011 days. Uno continues to kick the shit out of Bailey though. Bailey manages a sweet headkick and fires UHP with some chops. Uno no sells like it is 1993 All Japan and corners Bailey with wicked chops of his own. Bailey responds with a strange corkscrew kick and Uno is reeling kids. Bailey displays his Speedball ways with fast corner kicks but Uno tries to thwart him with avalanches. Bailey keeps the kicks coming and also hits a standing Sliced Bread for two. Uno is on his knees, pleading for forgiveness but Bailey has him eat kicks until Uno reverses it all into a nice tornado bomb with one arm! Bailey responds with? Kicks! Also a crazy running, corkscrew shooting star for two! Reverse hurricanrana to the floor by Bailey! Uno is on the floor and Bailey says “hey cool, I can do a fucking nuts spot now” and does a crazy corkscrew plancha from the top turnbuckle and doesn't land it well at all. Uno still sells and I go meh. Uno nails a weird electric chair into a neckbreaker. Uno makes Bailey eat his shoe and Bailey bumps like a madman off of it. Uno then nails a powerbomb into a sick looking piledriver! Bailey looked dead but SURVIVES. Bailey hits a reverse hurricanrana in the ring this time. Uno doesn't sell it really at all and gets to the second rope nailed a tombstone from the second rope! Uno sells his knee and has been since that neckbreaker from previously. Bailey kicks out of course. Bailey plays dead so Uno decides it is time to fly and hits a Terry Funk from 2000 esque moonsault and Bailey is HULKIN' UP! Bailey goes into his side kick flurry that is a thing of beauty. Uno responds with slaps but Bailey kicks the dog shit out of his head. Bailey then hits a shooting star double knee to the kneeling Uno followed by a roundhouse kick to a downed Uno for the finish. Good heart but again so many MOVEZ and such little selling. **1/2

Drew Galloway vs Roderick Strong(c) PWG World Championship.

I love Galloway these days. So intense looking and a big bastard. Roddy is rubbing off on me too with his dickish ways and smooth work. Roddy absolutely feels like that college frat dick and it makes me love him even more in the ring. Roddy tells Rick Knox to fuck off and he isn't allowed to ref his matches now. I love this, even more heat for the molten Roddy to PWG crowds. Strong tries to cheap shot Galloway but gets caught and Drew brings the HEAT. Roddy gets thrown from one end of the ring to the other. Galloway is just manhandling Roddy early here. We go into the crowd with some trash brawling. We get a nice chop exchange followed by Roddy getting launched into the wall. Drew tosses Roddy into the wall proper but it looks like shit. Roddy redeems things with his always golden chops. Roddy does an awesome baseball slide that sends Drew to the floor hard. Roddy leaps into Drew and Drew manages to hit a tilt-a-whirl slam while falling on his ass. Very impressive actually. We find ourselves on the apron and Roddy DEMOLISHES Drew's spine on the apron with a nice side slam variant. Roddy with a 2005 Angle Slam onto the apron and we get back into the ring. Drew kicks out though. Roddy is really good at wearing guys down. He does well keeping Drew grounded with little holds and strikes. Drew stays alive with random strikes but Roddy continues to keep him down. Roddy delivers a truly textbook dropkick on Drew who sells like he's shot but KICKS OUT AT TWO. It certainly isn't the old days. Roddy loses focus fucking with a fan and Drew takes advantage. Roddy acts like D'Lo Brown and hits a sweet jumping heel kick. Drew is selling like a real babyface here, clawing up to his feet. Roddy keeps fucking with fans and gets caught by Drew. Roddy hits a weird belly to back suplex that shows off his strength because I think he just manhandles Drew to the mat. Roddy gets caught and driven into a buckle bomb and the odds are even here! Drew hits a bullshit Stinger Splash followed with a Kane-like top rope clothesline. Nice spinebusteer though down the road by Drew. We get an odd swinging facebuster by Drew followed by Roddy being put on the top turnbuckle and kicked in the ribs. Drew tries something else but Roddy drops him in a tree of woe. Roddy is finally suplexed by Drew out of the corner and Drew tops it off with a reverse Alabama Slam into the corner as well as a running kick. Some time later we get a curb stomp by Roddy! Love that move. A lot of these moves seemed awkward on Galloway so I feel like Roddy should have worked the match somewhat differently. Some of his usual power moves looked strange with such a large opponent taking them. Not sure who's fault that even is but it hurt the match. Roddy confuses me. Is he a cruiserweight style worker or an old school type of technician? This questions plagues my opinion on him because he switches gears in odd ways. Cool tombstone spot by Drew that gets a near fall. Why? Because why not, that is why! Drew sells it like his last ditch effort though so that is fun. Drew says it is all over but Roddy moves out of the corner and Drew hits his shoulder on the post VERY ORIGINAL STUFF. Roddy baits the ref by sliding a title belt in his view while holding another one but the ref catches him. Roddy has another belt though! BELT SHOT TO THE FACE! Drew kicks out though! Alas, the spirit of Eddie Guerrero from SmackDown is not enough for Roddy to squirm away with a win. We get about 5 knee strikes before Roddy hits a nice End of Heartache backbreaker for the win. Solid match. ***1/2