#ProjectReseda: PWG is Pimpin' in High Places

PWG Pimpin' In High Places

We're back in the Jewish Center and WE HAVE COMMENTARY AGAIN THANK GOD! TARO joins them on commentary fuck yeah! Man, I seriously love the commentary because it's just completely random bullshit.

Phoenix Star vs Puma vs Zokre

LUCHA! That is about all there is to say here for a pretty good match. Puma keeps Phoenix Star on the floor while he works on Zokre. Fuckin' cut off that ring. Super cool double facebuster by Phoenix Star on his opponents. Zokre and Phoenix Star are pretty good so I see now why they were a random tag team when I first started watching PWG myself. I thought they sucked because I was YOUNG AND DUMB. Zokre does some wild shit here. This is an enjoyable sprint. **

The Havana Pitbulls(Ricky Reyes and Rocky Romero) vs Aerial Xpress(Quicksilver and Scorpio Sky)

Here we have the PWG debuts of The Pitbulls, a team that was a staple of pretty much any major indy show in the mid 2000's. I'm pumped to see baby Rocky Romero because I'm a big fan of his in 2016 and kind of forgot about his stuff from this time. Romero decides it is best to stretch Quicksilver, I couldn't agree any more. We discover on commentary that Disco Machine is indeed rich and doesn't tip worth a fuck. That has nothing to do with this match but I wanted to note it. I'm really impressed with Quicksilver and Scorpio here, they can go man! Pitbulls are pretty darn good too. Stereo topes are fuckin' SERIOUS as Excalibur would say from Scorpio and Quicksilver. Solid match. **1/2

Chris Bosh vs Excalibur, “Hair vs Hair”

I'm pretty damned happy to see this. This is a sprint early and Bosh does a fucking MAD tope con hilo from the top turnbuckle to the floor! Bosh takes him back into the ring to give him punishment. The commentary during this match is pure comedic gold by the way. Seriously though I really like this match and is better than I expected it to be as a match itself. Excalibur whoops on that ass for a while, making Bosh prove himself to these fans in the Jewish Center. We go full lucha hate when Bosh rips Excalibur's mask because he doesn't CARE about anonymity. Bosh murders Excalibur with a Steiner Screwdriver. Bosh gets DQ'd when he goes apeshit and attacks the ref and Quicksilver and Scorpio run him off YAY...except they TURN ON EXCALIBUR!? Dammit WHY? This is pretty damn awesome. ***

The Ballard Brothers vs M-Dogg 20 and Jardi Frantz

Oh christ, the worst match so far in PWG history decides to team up against the solid as shit Ballards. This is quite literally Matter vs Anti-matter for early PWG. We get a great story about Jardi fucking some older woman so that makes me like him a smidgen. This is way better than I expected I must say because I'm guessing The Ballards are just THAT good. Frantz looked pretty solid though in the early going. The Ballards do what all badass tag teams do and that is cut off the ring and fuck up their opponents one by one. Frantz does a badass plancha late in the match only to be outmatched by M-Dogg who nails a Sasuke Special. This is a very ok match. **

Samoa Joe vs BJ Whitmer

Whitmer makes his debut of course and Samoa Joe IS the man of course. How much punishment will Whitmer be able to weather to have a chance to win? This is what you'd expect from these two at this time which is hard hitting and technically based. Anyone that knows me knows I'm a huge Joe mark so it'll take a lot to make me dislike a match of his. Joe's corner uranage fucking WRECKS Whitmer and so does the knee drop that follows. Joe is fuckin' angry now and that is when he is best. Whitmer was so good at this time and this match is no different. Whitmer starches Joe with a nice t-bone suplex but Joe ain't gonna die. Lovely match. ***

Super Dragon, Colt Cabana, and Adam Pearce vs CM Punk, Joey Ryan, and Frankie Kazarian

The highly anticipated main event is HERE. Super Dragon ruins a fan's night by slapping his 40 ounce out of his hand to the adulation of the rest of the crowd. DICK LEVEL IS WAY OVER 9000. I'm a mark for this match happening at all and am anxious to see how this all unfolds. Punk and Dragon start us off and I'm trying to keep it together and not make this 5 stars immediately. I'll manage, dear reader, I'll manage. Pearce comes in now instead and so does Kazarian now. I love it because no one touches yet we get like 5 tags. This is like a beer sampler pack of wrestling, much like the one TARO consumed on commentary during this show. What I mean by that is, everyone gets a little bit of time to show their wares and it makes for a fun combination. There is a fair amount of awkward moments though like CM Punk teabagging Pearce in mid air in surely a leapfrog attempt as well as Joey Ryan taking a really shit double team. Colt pulls out THE CLAW YES. Pearce takes a really nasty bump to the floor that leads to a MENTAL, TRIPLE PLANCHA TO THE FLOOR by Punk, Ryan, and Kazarian. One of the coolest spots ever happens when Dragon and Cabana go for the Doomsday Device but Punk follows through while taking the move and drops Cabana on his head with a reverse rana! These six men love danger and wrestling, so they're alright with me. Pearce through it all is always looking for a shortcut and by god he will not rest until he GETS THE W! This is just awesome. ***1/2

Our post show interviews tell us a lot about the men in the main event. Pearce claims size doesn't matter, which is such a beautiful lie. Joey Ryan is fuckin' pissed and not very good at promos yet. We also hear that Kazarian is actually a man and Punk fuckin' ROCKS it as usual on the mic. Punk says shit is personal now. Kazarian tries for a serious promo but boy, it's kinda lame.

Overall Show Rating: B+